Sacred Love - The Rituals of Love

Surrender to love. Today, and every day, fall in love, again, and again and again. Give more than is expected of you. Expect no reward. The beauty of love will be half won when you learn the secret of putting out more than is expected in all that you do. Make yourself so valuable to your beloved that eventually you will become indispensable. Find their dream and help them live it. Exercise your privilege to support their journey, go the extra mile, and enjoy all the rewards you receive. You deserve them!

Today

Do something special for someone out of love

Laugh even if you have to invent it

Cry one tear of gratitude

Accept a gift

Live a dream

Use Magic

Float

Stay still for just 5 minutes on your own

Breath a breath of life giving air

Clear your mind for 30 seconds

Look up

Say thank you

Give somebody a special treat

Be Gentle

Step back from it all for just one long breath.

Succeed

To be in love, and to stay in love, is to surrender to another person. Then we open to direct communication. There is no trust required if the ego is soft. To be in a relationship, and celebrate the spontaneity of falling in love, we cannot hide. We cannot be embarrassed about our strange collection of qualities. We present everything as it is. And in return we must welcome our lover, without ego, and accept their strange collection of qualities too. Surrender means working together with love. You cannot take the moral high ground and still hold love sacred. You cannot surrender to love and then say, "IF".

Surrender means, "Here I am, and here you are". There is no need to make you better so that "I can love you in the future". There is no "if" in love.

To surrender means you'll need to get used to marching directly into disappointment, work with disappointment, go into it, and make it an acceptable and important part of your way of life. Your expectations are not true, they are the barrier to the journey of love, so you must stop hoping to achieve them in your relationship, not want to achieve them, but to dismantle them.

Disappointment is a good sign of loving intelligence, because it reveals an honesty between your expectations and your love. It cannot be compared to anything else; it is so sharp, precise, obvious and direct. If we can open, surrender to love, then we suddenly begin to see that our expectations are not going to be met, no matter how much we try. Every time we change somebody, move them shift them, love dies. Wanting things to be different than they are is the mark of the ego. This is not love, this is the ego. They are opposites. So it takes courage to say, "You didn't meet my expectations, and that revealed how much I needed to grow." This is sacred love. A moving soft ego, always looking to adapt.

To stay in Love means we come down into the dirty, ordinary, street scene of reality. That is where real devotion and love exists. When we love someone we must learn to trust ourselves, surrender to love. This does not involve preparing for a soft landing, being half in and half out, hedging your bets. Nobody ever succeeded by creating escape routes.

I raced a surf ski in the life saving carnivals in Australia. Sometimes the waves were 20 feet high, and to crash the ski was an amazingly dangerous thing. But it happened nearly every time, because so many of us were going down the waves thinking, "What happens if I crash?". One day, I was out in huge waves with an old guy, a veteran with the oldest wooden ski. As the biggest wave of the day rose behind us, twenty-five foot like a building, I watched this old guy, I saw the look on his face, and he was just like a child. He looked 15 years old, his smile could have lit a city, his hooting and hollering was so enthusiastic, he was having a ball. Instead of holding back, thinking "What happens if...", he just threw his whole heart and soul into that wave and had the time of his life. I just fell in love with his exuberance, and thought that anybody who puts so much into anything they do is going to attract a crowd. He said to me later, "One great thing about age, there's less to go that there was, you know if you die, you may as well die with a smile on your dial, having a ball, doing it all."

Love actually means being prepared to land on hard, ordinary ground; on the rocky, wild countryside of confrontation of your own issues. What you don't like in your lover is a mirror of your ego. Once we open ourselves, then we land on what is, it's disappointing, and this is the real beauty of love. People can reject your expectations, they cannot reject your love.

In true love, you have to allow your "self" to surrender. There is nothing to fear losing once you identify with the simplicity of surrender. The only thing that can be hurt is your ego, so if you can develop a soft ego, you will be free to hold that power of love anytime you choose. If your ego can flex, then there is no hurt. Instead of taking the ego and emotions so seriously, take love seriously. Love can shine through everything. The key to doing this is to surrender the moral high ground, and automatically you soften your ego, you.

Ritual

Try taking time to sit quietly in nature daily and imagine how much you love your lover, or ex-lover, once you drop any expectation of them. Consider all the issues you see in them as a mirror of you. By finding the balance, see if you can love those issues in you. You must remain committed to continuously improving this skill of discernment between a love free of expectation, and a love filled with judgments and projection. The real power you have in life, is to drop your ego driven judgments of right and wrong. Just love. No forgiveness. Love like that day on the beach when I saw the moon. Let go, fall in love with all those who have been on your path. Feel it sitting behind all the facades, and know that it is always there. This is nature's healing.

We bring our devotion into everyday life through the art of ritual. Rituals are more than acts of anchoring, they become acts of devotion to something beyond the self.

Ritual is an act of respect for someone or something outside ourselves, a large or small act of giving without need or desire to receive. Ritual can be spontaneous, but the true value of ritual is a relentless commitment, come rain, hail or shine.

That is the difference between doing something for ego, and doing it for ritual. Steadiness is the mark of ritual. Rituals of steadiness are repeated day, after day, after day. They are not for self, but are a mark of respect for something higher, like a purpose in life.

Ritual is how we bridge the inspiration of our inner stillness with the spontaneity of everyday life. If you walk around India, you will see this ritual as a way of life. Small paintings on doorsteps, the day couldn't begin without it, or the candle lit in the hall in honor of a deceased relative, or incense burning as a thank you to the Gods. Flowers adorn alters, not requesting privilege, it is an act of ritual. And nothing could prevent it happening. It is a mark of respect to something bigger than the individual.

Rituals are acts of Devotion. Here are some wonderful examples that people have developed and shared with me over the years. Remember, ritual is not an act of manifestation of anything, it is a remembrance of the divine nature of life.

1. Maintaining an altar in your home and keeping it clean daily.

2. Lighting a candle in the evening.

3. Saying a prayer of thank you at meal time.

4. Holding hands in the park.

5. Maintaining a garden.

6. Having a photo wall of those you love.

7. Having an affirmation wall with pictures of future dreams on it

8. Writing love letters to each other and posting them.

9. Cleaning the kitchen as an act of love.

10. Saving money according to an agreed plan for the future.

11. Never going to bed with an argument in progress

12. Loyalty, always standing up for and speaking well of your lover.

13. Prioritisation of your relationship over other things.

14. Maintaining health and wellness so you can turn up for love.

Can you see that we can re arrange many everyday tasks so they become acts of love? Even taking the garbage out can become a ritual act of love that makes your partners life easier. Then we are acting with loving intent, and it will be rewarded ten fold. In this way, we are not feeding the ego through what we do, we are humble to ritual, and the key is to be willing to maintain that ritual even when you don't want to, or need to, any longer. These are just a few ideas on the rituals of love. I am sure you can think of a few more unique ones between you. Remember to make them every day events and easy.

Today, love without expectation. Love someone you hate, love someone you fear, love someone you left behind and don't take their reaction to heart. Make every day a Valentines day, and see how many people you can honor, past present and future. Love them from a place if gratefulness. Love them knowing tomorrow may never come and know that the deepest regret any human being can have, is to hold back their love, even for a second.

Today, light a candle in your heart for all those people that you love or have loved. Drink a glass of fresh water to their beauty, their gifts and their ways. Hope and wish that today, on this everyday Valentines day, they are in love, with love and they are happy. What else could real love be, but the wish for someone else's happiness.

Loving acts are acts done out of love, because of love, and without the expectation of love in return.

Humility is important as well. To get past the Ego is to cut away the rough edges of vanity, which hurts and disturbs those one meets in life. Vanity is separateness. Truly loving individuals will recognise themselves in others, and rather than judge them as less, they appreciate the mirror. It is of no service to yourself or your relationship to judge another as less or more. It is expansive to acknowledge our own humility. So many of life's stresses can be extinguished at the source, if we are able to recognise ourselves in others.

Devotion means that our lover's happiness becomes a high priority. This is the demonstration of our love. There is nothing more important, nothing more potent, than the small acts of our devotion. We dedicate every circumstance we can to their improvement and happiness.

Chris Walker is a world leading change agent, an environmentalist and author of more than 20 books. Born and bred in Australia, he consults to people and organisations throughout the world on improved relationships, health and lifestyle through the application of the Universal laws of Nature. The result he offers is that we stay balanced, share loving relationships, work with passion, enjoy success, and live our personal truth. To learn more about Chris?s work and journeys to Nepal, visit http://www.chriswalker.com.au

Falling In Love - Is It True Love or Infatuation?

Falling in love - someday it will happen to you. You will find yourself suddenly falling in love and it will amaze you.

You can't run away from it. Love eventually catches up with everyone. It may be sooner or later. Whatever the time, however long it takes, you can be absolutely sure someday will fall head over heels in love with someone.

But that is not the scary part.

The part that scares most people is the fact love sometimes tend to be blind - or so it seems.

The truth is, true love is hard to come by. Real love is rare. When you finally find something that seems like true love, you grab it with both hands. You invest everything you've got in it. Unfortunately, you may find out months later that it isn't real love. You have been chasing a dream!

That brings us back to the really scary part. Love tends to be blind. People falling in love tend to be irrational and illogical. The love emotion takes over. Thereafter nothing else matters.

Why is this scary?

The answer is simple. Love can be destructive. Love, blind love, can ruin your life.

Yes, some kind of love is blind love. This kind of love is infatuation.

True love or real love, is constructive and upbuilding. True love is

Realistic
Compassionate
Considerate
Unselfish
Practical and down-to-earth

Blind love or infatuation is unrealistic, selfish, and destructive.

When falling in love, ask yourself what kind of love you are falling into. Is it true love or infatuation? Is your love based on unselfish and realistic expectations or on a fantasy?

Consider an example of how blind love, infatuation, can be.

Sharon was from a decent and wealthy home. She was an undergraduate who had everything she wanted. She was astoundingly beauty and well-trained and cultured. Understandably, suitors came in droves.

Her father's wealth poured her way so she was rich in the accepted sense of the word. The suitors asking her hand in marriage were just as rich. Many had an enviable social status.

However, Sharon just wasn't interested. Marriage wasn't in her books yet. And when she decides to get married, she would marry the man of her dreams. So she said.

Eventually, Sharon fell in love. Unfortunately, her lover was a rude shock to everyone including her parents.

Sharon's boyfriend was a heroine smoking cult boy with an attitude. He wasn't exactly crazy about her. But she footed his bill and paid his way to smoking haven. So he put up with her.

Sharon, on the other hand, was madly in love. She saw something in him she hadn't seen anywhere else. Her boyfriend, Larry, was broad shouldered, tall, tough, raw, bold, unrelenting, and daring. He could stare death in the face and not bart an eyelid. Her boyfriend was a real man!

Sharon was madly in love with Larry and there was no stopping her. Her parents could not understand why their rich and well-breed daughter fell in love with a poor heroine smoking gangster. Her friends couldn't understand either.

Can you feel Sharon's love? Do you understand why her gentle her fell for a hoodlum?

Sharon fell in love with a dream - a bold, daring, no nonsense, dare devil guy. He had the looks and the heart of a lion. She admired that bravery, that manly boldness. Soon that admiration turned to love. And there was no stopping her.

However, she's on the wrong road.

True love is not based on physical attraction. Physical attraction eventually fails as people get older and age. What counts most is spiritual virtues - your lover's personality.

A heroine smoking gangster will eventually get into trouble and land himself in jail. A cultist gangster takes delight in beating people up and fomenting trouble. Sooner or later, if they get married, she may become a battered wife.

Do you get the point?

Infatuation is blind, physical, destructive. True love is clear-sighted, up-building,

refreshing.

True love, real love, is based on realistic expectations and facts. It is selfless and works for the good of her partner. Infatuation, on the other hand, doesn't care about reality. It focuses on the physical and immediate gain.

Evaluate your feelings properly before continuing with that love relationship.

Relationships based on true love lasts forever. Relationships based on infatuation are usually temporary and momentary. That is the very reason why some marriages last two weeks, some seven days and still others, a lifetime.

The difference is true love. Real love is true and lasts forever.

Thinking of falling in love?

Make sure it is real love. Evaluate your lovers potentials in relation to your desire most - what is known and proven to that make relationships last.

Hey, fall in love the right way. It's your life. It's your future. It's your happiness at stake.

Samson Itoje is a seasoned author and relationship expert. He offers free love relationship advice and love quiz at http://www.true-love-relationship-advice.com/love-quiz.html. His books on love, money, and business are available at http://www.lagos-nigeria-real-estate-advisor.com/book-store.html.

Universality of Love

"Love" A Small Word ... But This Word Has The Power To Rule The World. It's A Great Feeling To Be In Love. The Most Imp Question "Have You Ever Been In 'Love' Before??.." Some Would Say Yes To It And Some No. The Person Who Is In Love Has The Most Beautiful Life To Live. He Is The Most Powerful Person On The Planet.

Journey Of "Love" Is Like The Journey Of Life. If You Don't Stop Living Your Life Why You Should Stop Loving!! Love Can Be Defined As The Bond Between Two Individual Who Come Close By Gods Wish But Stay Together By Their Wish. It Was Because Of Love That Adam And Eve Came On This Earth. But In Today's World Love Has Got The Different Meaning. Some Say Love Is A Lust. And Some Say Love Is Life!!

"Love Is Like Death, Can Strike Anytime, Anywhere"

Love Is Living In The Feeling Rather Then Living Off The Feeling. "Life Is Beautiful". Life Becomes Beautiful Because Of Love ... Today Also Some People Say Love Is The Most Common Thing. One Can Agree Upon This If That Love Is True And Fair On Both The Side. Sky Is The Limit For Love ... One Cannot Know The Limit Of The Sky Similarly One Cannot Know The Limit Of Love . Love Is Not Guarded By Any One , Love Is The Wonderful Gift Given By One Individual To Other.

Love Has No Boundaries To Secure, No Walls To Look Upon. It's A Lovely Feeling, It's A Walk Through Heaven. One Who Lives For Love And Dies In Love Is The Most Fortunate Person. Love Is The Treasure Of Ones Life. The Person In Love Is The Most Richest Person Because He Has Got The Most Precious Possession Which Even The Richest Person On Planet Has Not Got.

There Are Arguments In Favor Of Love And In Against Of Love .. In Today's Modern And Dynamic World People Say They Don Have Time To Fall In Love. But They Dont Know That One Doesn't Fall In Love , Instead They Rise In Love .. With The Support Of Love One Can Win Any Battle Of His Life. Just Ask The Person Who Is In Love That "How Is Life To Him/Her"? The Answer Will Be Life Is Love And Love Is Life For Us.. There Are Some Weak Points In Love But Who The Hell Cares .. Just Keep On Loving ... Because Love Is The Whole Truth And Nothing But The Truth........

When A Person Whom You Love , Rejects You , Don't Be Upset Because You Have Lost A Person Who Never Loved You But That Person Has Lost The Person Who Always Loved Her.....What Is Love???? Those Who Don't Have , Calls It A Responsibility, Those Who Play In Love Calls It A Game , Those Who Don't Have Calls It A Dream And Those Who Have Calls It A Life...In Life Don't Love The Person Whose Love For You Changes With Time , But Love The Person Whose Love Remains Same Even When The Time Changes. It Is Said That " Speak Less To The Person You Love Most Because If They Cant Understand Your Silence They Will Never Understand Your Words "..

Some Say That Falling In Love Is The Secret Ambition And Some Say That Finding Love Is The Greatest Tension .. Its Ordinary To Love A Marvelous , But It Is Marvelous To Love An Ordinary... Anyone Can Love A Rose But It Takes A Great Deal To Love A Leaf.. Learn To Love The People Who Are Willing To Love You At Present , Forget The People In The Past And Thank Them For Hurting You Which Helped You To Love The People You Have Today ... Again What Is "Love"??? Its That Time When You Are Willing To Make Yourself Miserable To Make Someone Else Happy !!! This Is Called Love.

There Are Three Simple Ways To Die, First: Take Poison... Second: Jump Into The Well And Third: Cut Your Nerves .. But If You Can't Do This Much Than The Most Easiest Way To Die Is " Just Fall In Love ".... The One Who Loves You The Most Sometimes Hurts You The Most , But Don't Feel Bad Because That Person Is The Only One Person Who Will Feel Your Pain . Its Like That " If You Are Not In Love You Are Missing Everything In Life And If You Are In Love With Some One And Not Getting That Person You Are Missing Everything In Life. You don't have to get lucky in love. You can be smart!

Conclusion:

At Last, Some Love Quotes From The Well known Authors:

"Three Great Virtues Are Faith, Hope and Love.

But The Greatest Of These Is Love"

"Love Is Not About Finding The Right Person, But Creating The Right Relationship. It's Not About How Much Love You Have In The Beginning But How Much Love You Build Till The End"

"Love Is A Strong Positive Emotion Of Regard And Affection. It Is The Deepest Of Emotions. Love Is Also The Object Of Warm Affection Or Devotion"

Finally, Love Is What Can Be Felt But Can't Be Told.. It Can Be Given But Not Sold .. It Comes When You Don't Need It But Leaves You When You Need It The Most!!! So Always Remember Never Hate A Person Because By Hating Him You Are Loving Him The Most ....

Written by,

Samee Peterson

Suji Peterson

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The Inspiration to Change the World Can Get in the Way of the Inspiration to Love It

You might say "I hate this and I love that" but this is impossible. Love and hate are not opposites. A loving person cannot love one thing and hate another. This is the mark of a righteous person or an emotional person. It is the mark of the ego.

Lovers become jealous when their partner loves other people and they complain. But they are barking up the wrong tree. A lover, who loves, loves many, many people. How can they switch this on, and switch this off. A loving person loves both sexes. There is no limitation to sexual preferences, and certainly no religious organization has the right to speak love on one hand and limit it to relationships and sexual preference on the other.

I you are a loving person then you love people. Then you know, if you feel hate or resentment or distaste, it is your incapacity to love that is tested, not some self manufactured, protective judgment you have made on people who are worthy of love.

When we say we want to change someone, we have stopped loving them. If we cannot see the beauty then we cannot see the love. It is the same with the world. The ancient mysteries are mirrored in the laws of nature and these are what I teach. Nature is not prejudice or righteous, it loves, and the mysteries say the same.

If there is a limit to what you love on earth, then there is a limit in you, not the earth. The earth does not need your judgment, neither do your children, partner or friends. The earth needs your love.

Nature takes care of this argument. She is more smart than David Suzuki and other activists think. She places one half of the human race on the consumption path, and the other half of the human race on the conservation path. Then Yin and Yang are balanced. Both groups think they are right. And they are. But the wise person, who is committed to love and not righteousness, sees that they are both right, and therefore does not get caught in hate and emotion. The wise person sees that between two opposing forces, nature is evolving at the right pace.

In our own life, shit happens. The spiritual types and the highly religious types spend their whole lives trying to fight that truth. They think there is a psychotic God somewhere who is casting judgment on the good guys and bad guys. But this is absurd. How can you have a loving heart if you are always casting judgment of hate this and want to change that? That is a paranoid life.

The laws of nature, really the ancient mysteries translated, are not given to you so you can change the world, they are given so you can se the beauty of it. That means rising above the muck. You want a life in the muck, then join the anti this, or the pro that. This is what is called the mass consciousness. You can't have a loving heart in the mass consciousness. That mass consciousness is religious consciousness, made of worthy and unworthy of love. This is not what I share with the world, lets make no mistake and confuse the two.

In my new book on Sacred Love, I talk about a loving lifestyle. How can you have a loving lifestyle if you always want to change things? Then, if you want to change things, (and therefore people) you are always separate from people. This is not love. This is mind. Mind cannot love, it can only imitate love by creating emotions, desires, expectations.

Love comes when the mind is confused. Yes, if you give the mind one piece of information it is happy. Then it can place it in the brain and cause a response. This is hot, this is cold. This is right this is wrong. That is why people who have control issues are also religious people. They are always looking for more right, or more better or more spiritual so that they can have just one thought. This person cannot love, they can only think love, or imitate love.

If you feed the mind two pieces of conflicting information, then we say, "Oh, I am confused" but if we can relax, and not struggle with confusion we have intuition. When the mind gets two pieces of conflicting information it (this is the ego) gets panic attacks. Go left, go right? It can't decide. Actually, this is the obsession with people who only learn half of spirituality; the new age seeker, the meditator, the yogi, the Buddhist, a born again Christian who learned from a book about life.

The books can't sell if they don't speak left or right answers. So the books say "this is better than that" so, the reader reads, the mind is fed with rubbish and that person thinks they are better off. But they lost love. You will see it. So many people who do yoga and meditation, and born again and Buddhist new learners, they have bad relationships, emotional relationships, bad health, bad problems. This is because they already had the idea that there was something wrong, and now they got a new way to judge it. They stayed in their mind, nothing changed except the justification.

I am trying to teach you something else. Something different from the Guru or the yoga book or the Buddhist lecturer about peace. I am trying to give you peace. Yes, peace comes only when the mind is confused. Can you understand that a mind with a single thought feels comfortable because it "knows" - but this mind is not capable of love. So once you know something, you're buggered.

If you want love, you have to seek out just the first law of nature. Not the other four. Just one simple law. That law is that there are two sides to everything. So in fact the mind is comfortable only when it defies the first law of nature. If you feed the truth to the mind, it goes into violent reaction and rejects the news. The mind is afraid (that's why the ego exists) of loosing itself. So it panics when there is balanced information, it runs away from relationships when there is truth. The mind is a God, and it seeks half truth. Just like a religious God, that feeds the ego.

The law of balance tells you that there are two sides to everything. This is the knowledge of the great mysteries. They destroyed that library in Alexandria, Egypt in order to create religion, but the secrets are still in the world. You have to become a warrior in order to rise above religious dogma of one sided information in order to live a loving lifestyle. Then, you must also be prepared to understand that 6 billion people don't get it. And about 100,000 do.

If your mind gets balanced information like: The forest in the Amazon needs protecting, and the forest in the Amazon needs chopping, then it is really cheesed off. What the hell? What are you saying? Two opposite truths? Can't be. But this is love. Love means your boyfriend, or girlfriend is good news and bad. But your mind hates some things and wants to change them, and so, you say "I love you --- as long as ----" or "I love you - if" -

Now there is conditional love. Mind love. This is not real love, not sacred love, no, this is expectations love, this is mind love, imitation. Most people imitate love. They say "I want a relationship that is like the one on Gone with the Wind" so now, the mind has an idea, and then the mind examines that relationship, compares that relationship, judges their partner, expects things. So the mind is really happy because it knows what it wants. But love cannot exist at the same time in a body with a mind that knows what it wants. Either the ego is in control or love is, both can't share at the same time.

So, people do courses, they do yoga they read new age books and they go to lectures to improve. But there is a problem. All those teachings are lies. Even the teachers are lairs. They can't live what they teach. They pretend like an actor, and they sell ideas, and people think those ideas are legit. But they are lies.

The happy person has two sides. Nature guarantees that. No person ever lived the 10 commandments, the Buddhist dharma, the Yama and Niyama of Yoga. No one ever did what they preached. Never. Those teachings are religious and they are designed to give us an aspiration, but we will always fail. Those teachings are designed to feed the ego, give the mind happiness, satisfy our lust to become immortal. This is a lie.

The truth is behind those teachings. Those teachings are designed to keep you in control and because of that alone they are precious. But those teachings cannot give you any love, none, not one penny of love. They can only show you how it aspire to it, imitate it and hope for it.

So, I am not arguing against religious teachings. I am talking about a totally different topic. I am talking about being in love now, living in love today, being real, not imitating, trusting that, if your mind goes for a break, you'll be fine.

I can' teach this sitting in an office or doing collapse process in a fancy hotel. I can teach this love and mystery in nature, because here, the ego is disarmed, your clothes aren't made by Gucci, your underpants will be sweaty, your ego shoes will be covered in cow dung, the ego can't hold on, and there, underneath all that is a beautiful, precious, magnificent smile. And there you have it, love.

I hope you see the difference. Love is not an aspiration. Love is what exists before you want it. For the most part, to becoming a loving person you'll need to unlearn so much of what you learned - because all that was to protect yourself. But when you have love, really, you find out how unimportant you are, and how beautiful this whole, magnificent, stunningly delicious universe is, right there in front of you, mirrored in a leaf from a tree, or the fingernails of a baby. So easy, yet, such a journey.

I want to share my global vision as part of this article, I hope you find it "GOOD AND BAD' and by doing so, feel the love behind it. Remember, it is impossible to stop judging, that is a psychotic and dangerous state, it is only possible to judge more, and in doing so, judge everything extremely good, and extremely bad, and if you can see that in the same moment, you'll burst open, like a beautiful rose, you'll burst open with love.

When you hear someone say "don't judge" - you can laugh and remember the years you spent trying, as they will, to do the impossible.

Chris Walker's global Vision.

To communicate the message and essence of modern well-being (consciousness and spirituality) at all levels of society (personal, community, corporate & global). To help people become healthier, more inspired by life, more in love with their lover and better able to live their expanded potential. To bring more heart, happiness and love to everyday life. To foster a new generation of leaders. To share wisdom of natures law with all generations. To transform educational systems, practices and culture for less competition and more inspiration. To awaken the power and beauty of the human heart and stop persecution and injustice. To help children throughout the world get a fair go in both wealthy and poor environments. To use natures law to guide a new global vision. To bridge the social, human, economic, and humanitarian gaps caused by religion. To share - tools and knowledge for living an inspired guided life. To educate - a transformative approach to the development of learning that prevents illness. To heal community, corporate and global environments. To fight against self absorption of self help, drugs and un ethical guidance. To inspire a new global perspective in healing, management and global reconciliation. To create global change in the way people relate. To translate the laws of nature to the world. To help move the world through its next evolutionary phases.. To initiate a new global paradigm shift in business. To celebrate the beauty of creation in everyday reality.

Through the laws of nature, to impart the knowledge, mysteries and wisdom of the ages, to those that are ready.

With Spirit

Chris Walker is a world leading change agent, an environmentalist and author of more than 20 books. Born and bred in Australia, he consults to people and organisations throughout the world on improved relationships, health and lifestyle through the application of the Universal laws of Nature. The result he offers is that we stay balanced, share loving relationships, work with passion, enjoy success, and live our personal truth. To learn more about Chris's work and journeys to Nepal, visit http://www.chriswalker.com.au

SacredLove - Building Long Term, Sexy, Loving, Powerful, Authentic Relationships that Last

Emotion is energy in motion. At its most primal level it swings between extremes right or wrong, attracted or repelled. Emotion is the opposite to love. Highly emotional people are living in the most fundamental of human consciousness, whether they are fighting for religious causes, or in a relationship fighting to be right. This is emotional unconsciousness; "I've got to" do this and "I have to" do that, which are very violent and polarised positions. But nature will not allow this for long.

Nature destroys anything that does not fulfil its purpose, and staying primal, highly emotional, is not fulfilling natures purpose. The result is illness, nervous tension, stress, burnout, depression, disease and relationship failure. Natures weapons are so numerous, and all of them point to emotional stuckness. People who refuse to grow.

The most common way to avoid growth that love brings is by using blame. This moral high ground, emotional reaction and high expectation sits a persons mind high above the rocky swamps of real life authenticity, and is designed to avoid the love that comes from open communication. To stay dry while all else is wet, to keep the ego fully intact, avoid dealing with the stories and beliefs that they are attached to, and blame (judge) others for causing how they feel. Like religious fundamentalism, it is simply an unwillingness to let go of beliefs that come from a primal consciousness and are extremely one sided. Stories.

The more willing you are to see two sides of the coin, the less righteous you will be, and the less emotional your swings of emotion. Instead of "I am right" you might say "maybe we both are right" or you might say "I admit that I can only see my side of the story, and therefore I am wrong" - These honest and authentic statements of confessed righteousness free a person from the cave from which their consciousness is coming from, and steps them out into the possible realm of love. Being right, is the opposite to being in love. Then, as your emotional swings get smaller and smaller, less energy is spent on being right, and more energy is spent on growing and staying in love.

So, we use challenges to grow love. Every time we get challenged (emotionally negative) we process it, and turn it into love. That way, we stay in the honeymood. We can't just ignore the negative stuff because it builds up, causes abuse, and makes us resentful. We have to process the negative stuff so it doesn't block our love. It is like moving sand through an hourglass. In the top is the ego. In the bottom is love. We take the experiences at the top, everyday emotion, and move them to love. The more we process through the hourglass, the bigger our love can be.

Emotions block love. No relationship, sacred or otherwise, can thrive when a couple considers their emotions a foundation, because then they can't grow in love. You can't base your relationship with someone you love on feelings and emotions. It is a disaster, and you are like a leaf blowing in the wind. The wind (emotions) blow you left, you go left and shut down, they blow you right, and you are infatuated and happy. It is like a little child in a candy shop. No love can last in that whirlwind of emotional drama.

This is the choice you have. You can love people, but not be prepared to enter a relationship with them. That is a friendship. You can love someone and enter a relationship with them, and this means facing the challenges that a relationship brings in order to stay in love. But if you expect to be in a relationship with someone, and not face your ego, not confront your expectations and be revealed in your own judgments, then you do not really want love. You want peace, and in relationship, like nature, peace brings disease.

To be in relationship and hold love you need to stay vigilant to your ego. For example, our ego might want to see our partner as only a kind person. Our ego, if we empower it, says this is a good thing. We feel pleasure and this causes us to have a happy emotion. The ego is happy, because there is kind without cruel. But is this real, sustainable, true love, or is it the ego creating the grounds for a disaster in our relationship? The answer is obvious, projections and hopes are not love, they are our expectations, and expectations block love.

Infatuations mean we have half truth ideals and these are our emotional projections onto our beloved. That is not a true love, not love at all, just our emotional projection. In other words, infatuations make us blind to real love. We take our stories, our religious expectations, we take our reactions to our parents and build a model of who we want to be in love with. Then we say we are in love if we think this person matches our made up model. This emotional infatuation means we are having an affair with a fantasy of our beloved, not really accepting them for who they are. We mistake it for love and the confrontation of those expectations is called "growth".

Long term relationships cannot be based on this projection of fantasy, or delusion. In reality, all people have two sides. The more a person projects their "goodness" on you, the more they have mastered hiding their "badness", however, in the long term it will surface. Some people learn how to hide their other side, and get under your "half life" radar. This radar is looking for half a person, the good half, and as long as your illusions are justified, you can love them. This is the emotional definition of love, but it is false love, not real. No man or woman is half. They only present half because your projection won't let them in if they were real and showed you both halves. If they did, you would throw them out, because it would challenge your ideas, your expectations. You get what you want in the short term, the fantasy, but in the long term you get reality, and all your complaining, anger, blame and therapy won't fix the problem. But there is no problem to fix except your illusion of real people.

To say, "I love you because you are kind", is the ego speaking. Firstly, because kind has both good and bad in it, which you wont see until later. Secondly, you are assuming that there can be a half person in your life, kind but not unkind. So, we have half information and have an emotional upper. This is not love; it is a happy thought called the honeymoon. Sadly it will not last unless you are prepared to do some process on your expectations. There is nothing wrong with your beloved. You, your mind, your judgements, your expectations are at fault. You can blame them all you want, but this is not true love. And remember, how you treat others is how you treat yourself. How can you love yourself if you can't accept yourself? You'll end up your whole life in confession or asking forgiveness for being human. Is that self love, ashamed of who you really are?

This is emotional way of life is all very obvious when I take people trekking in the Himalayas of Nepal. They bring their way of thinking from back home, and try to apply it to walking up the side of steep hills. Their emotions take charge and at the bottom of the hill, they are enthusiastic, infatuated, brimming with excitement. But the hill is so long, that excitement turns to disbelief and frustration (the honeymoon is over). So, about 1 hour into the climb, the ego, being dualistic, swings to the other side, and our emotions "go downward", to balance the "upward emotion" of the first hour. People start to complain about the whole stupid hill, the boots hurt, legs ache. When the ego goes into emotional resentment it uses blame so that it doesn't feel stupid, and after 10 minutes blaming the bad path, the steep hill, neither of which really cares, they blame me.

Gradually the swings of emotion get shorter, from 1 hour down to 1 minute. An internal war begins, "Yes I can do it" to "No I can't make it" and finally, every step, "Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no." The brain is going mad, swinging, and just when it is ready to surrender, something else comes over them. The ego gives up and the emotions fall away. That ego which drives us in city life is just no use here, and we get a sense of spirit, our second wind.

Similarly, we start in a relationship by committing to climb this magnificent journey together. We jump in, full of tingles and bubbles, phone calls and emails, poems and flowers. Then we begin to close down. Emotions become more challenging than we thought, so we fight with our ego to change things, everything. For the first few years we are infatuated with our beloved. That is quite normal. It drives our sexual energy because nature thinks you are having babies. But then, you get resentful.

Infatuation breeds resentment. So then for the next years you start resenting them. Then after seven years or so, which we call the 7 year itch, you feel real love, balanced love but not emotional love. You loose the infatuation so you think it's over. But this is not over, you have finally found real love. Ambivalence means you have finally come the full circle, back to the beauty of authentic communion. Now you can have sacred love, because now it is not hormones racing, emotions infatuating, intellect projecting. Now, you can rest in love.

This means that to satisfy those primal elements of yourself, those elements that were so happy when you first met, you'll need to create them consciously. You'll need to know how to get your partner infatuated for a sexy night. You'll need to know how to get hormones racing. This is romance and it the essential ingredient of a long term relationship. Infatuation might have kick started your love relationship, but when all that settles down to true love, then your primal desires and needs have to be fed consciously. They don't go away, not even when you are 100 years old. Even then, a lover must know how to infatuate their beloved for a night.

It is inevitable in a relationship that is growing, that the infatuation that drove you together in the honeymoon period dies. This is not a time to part. No, it is a time to celebrate the beauty of a new level of love. Sacred Love. It has to because you want sacred love, not projections to bind you. But couples think because they are not excited by their lover, it is over. No, it is just ready to begin if we can get out of the cave consciousness and into sacred love.

So then, to grow in relationship, we can't remain a victim of circumstance. Otherwise, we or our partner are going to end up complaining that the passion went out of it. We'll be acting like cave people or like dogs, running around having affairs to keep our libido happy. Either that, or we simply resign ourselves to living an unromantic life. Dispirited at home and punishing everyone we know at work because of it. You don't run, you grow and take the bull by the horns. You learn to create those romantic moments, you create little peaks of infatuation. In order to move deeper in love, you need to keep the primal parts of you happy so they can liberate you for higher love.

Many people think that growing in love is not sexy, they think it is spiritual and they think spiritual is not sexy. But if the foundations are not poured, the building collapses. To grow in love to higher levels of love, you don't let go of the lower levels, you satisfy them. So sexy, romantic, infatuated (from time to time), values and more underpin the higher realms of love. However, instead of playing victim and complaining about your relationship, you know that nobody can do to you more than you do to yourself.

You can make your life as sexy, romantic and happy as you choose. You just need to get beyond victim and blame. Read the chapter "love is a lifestyle" and see just a few of the ways you can create passion and romance anytime you choose. It is important. Because it doesn't always take years to move from infatuation to sacred love. It can take days. And if you sit back being all spiritual or playing the victim (like he's just not into me) then, your love life and relationship is not going to take you to the magnificent place it can take you. Devotion, romance, authenticity, success, happiness, family and dedication do not come to you, they come from you. This is growth in love.

Chris Walker is a world leading change agent, an environmentalist and author of more than 20 books. Born and bred in Australia, he consults to people and organisations throughout the world on improved relationships, health and lifestyle through the application of the Universal laws of Nature. The result he offers is that we stay balanced, share loving relationships, work with passion, enjoy success, and live our personal truth. To learn more about Chris?s work and journeys to Nepal, visit http://www.chriswalker.com.au

Unconditional Love

'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' Jesus Christ; Matthew 22:37-39

Love is the law, love under will. Aleister Crowley; The Book of the Law

All you need is love, love. Love is all you need. John Lennon; song lyric

As the above suggest, love is certainly important to human-kind. Its importance is confirmed by a Google search returning no fewer than 1,480,000,000 hits for a search on "Love".

What is Love?

But what is really meant by "love", and in particular by "unconditional love"?

Love is what we feel (or maybe feel we ought to feel) for our child, partner, parents, family... But we also use the word to refer to things; "I love football, I love swimming..."

To love a thing simply means to like it very much. But to love a person is to value and care for that person as much as, if not more than, ourselves.

Love is something that cannot be kept to oneself. We need to give it in order to receive it. And despite the external appearance of some, at heart we all want to be loved.

A Definition of Unconditional Love

Quite simply, unconditional love is love without conditions. It is love without requiring anything in return, love no matter what. A classic example might be the undying love of a mother for a wayward son regardless of what human sins he might commit.

But isn't all real love unconditional, for if it carries conditions - "I'll love you if you love me, if you pay the bills, if you blah blah blah..." - it isn't love, but emotional blackmail.

It's easy to love those closest to us. Easy to love that with which we are familiar. But true unconditional love places no conditions such as I'll love you because you're my partner, child, parent... It is love for every part of the material and Spiritual realm. Regardless for whether we may know that which we love, regardless for how that which we love may have behaved towards us in the past.

Again we quote that great Spiritual teacher Lord Jesus, who said: But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. (Luke 6:27-32).

Spiritually we are all part of one great whole. Upon the individuation of incarnation we lose that sense of belonging - paradise lost. It is hidden from us on our quest to re-discover our true nature through the lessons of experience that are life.

Unconditional love represents our true Spiritual goal. The love of all others regardless of race, religion or deeds. For by truly giving unconditional love we recognize that we are part of that great oneness that is Spirit. In loving another we really love ourselves.

If it is hard to love a stranger, how much harder is it to love those we perceive as sinning against us? A shining example is that of Mrs Gee Walker whose son Anthony was murdered in a racist attack in Liverpool, England. Despite his killers remaining unrepentant Mrs Walker said, Unforgiveness makes you a victim and why should I be a victim? Anthony spent his life forgiving. His life stood for peace, love and forgiveness and I brought them up that way... I have to practice what I preach. Mrs Walker is one of very few Christians who actually practice the teachings of Lord Jesus, ie to love the sinner while hating their sins.

Practicing Unconditional Love

Life is hard. This is why our bodies, sophisticated to the n-th degree as they are, are designed to wear out. Else we would never be able to return to our true home in the realms of Spirit. To attain the state of unconditional love while clothed in human flesh is extremely hard, if not impossible. Those that have come close include Spiritual masters such as Buddha and the Lord Jesus. More modern examples would include Gandhi and Mother Theresa.

The state of absolute unconditional love is a part of perfection, which may be unattainable, but serves as an ideal to which we can all make progress towards.

In our daily work - most obviously in the caring professions - but all work involves in some way serving society in return for material reward. We can all try to go a little further than contractually required when such action results in the greater good. Take pride in what you do. Seek to be of service to your fellow man for its on sake and not solely for the resultant profit - though we all need food and shelter so the pursuit of fair profit is not intrinsically wrong.

In our Spiritual work - the Spiritual path is not for everyone, at least not this time around. But when appropriate it offers the opportunity to exercise unconditional love through healing, mediumship, or simply sending out positive thoughts to the world (also known as prayer).

In how we live our lives - showing our appreciation to those that help us, eg a mere please or thank you or a smile. Saying good morning or offering assistance to a stranger in need. The expression of positive views in conversation with friends and acquaintances. Through voting appropriately in ballots, writing to the press etc. In all of these ways we can express our love for our fellow beings with no strings attached.

Recognize the immense difficulty of attaining unconditional love in this world, but at least seek to extend our dimension of love beyond our closest circle. Remember the old adage that a stranger is only a friend we've yet to meet.

It is not necessary to renounce all our material possessions to do aid work in the 3rd world, though doing so might well accelerate the attainment of unconditional love. By simply being conscious of this ideal in all we do we make progress towards a major Spiritual goal.

Johnny Finnis is editor of new age spirituality explore - through various channels - the idea that this life, this world, is not the totality of our existence. In fact, it might be just one small part of something much bigger, just one tiny step along an infinite journey...

About Love - Loving Unconditionally

You may be familiar with the term unconditional love, but have you learned to practice this powerful concept? Unconditional love is a transformational gift that empowers us and those whom we love to become the best that we can be. It is fundamental to our happiness and wellbeing to learn how to love ourselves and others unconditionally.

Unconditional love is more than a powerful concept it is has the genuine power to heal both ourselves and people around us. When we love someone unconditionally we accept them with all of their flaws and weaknesses and transform those things within them which may be hard for them to accept into things they may more easily accept and deal with. When we accept ourselves for who we are with all our flaws then we empower ourselves to change and improve ourselves. Unconditional love tells another person that those things within themselves which they find fault with are ok, that they can accept those things about themselves and not feel badly about themselves or punish themselves for those things. And of course, when we love ourselves unconditionally we receive the same message and empower ourselves to grow and become better people.

Unfortunately it is part of the nature of our human condition to use our love as a manipulative tool. We may think we are trying to change something about someone we love for the better by placing conditions on our love, but this simply isn't true. By making our love for either ourselves or for others conditional we limit our love and effectively say we do not love ourselves or we do not love others in regard to whatever conditions we have defined.

Withdrawing our love from ourselves and from others can only ever harm both the person who feels less loved and the person who limits their love. A person who feels unloved by us may feel less love for themselves by finding fault with themselves for which they then withhold their own love of themselves doing themselves more harm. Or a person who has been denied love based on conditions may resent the limits of the love they have received and become angry or bitter toward someone who otherwise might love them. So conditional love is very harmful, it is not really love at all because it has the power to do so much harm.

We should never place limits or conditions on our love for anyone else, including ourselves. It is an injustice to love anyone, including ourselves, in any conditional manner. We should always look within ourselves and other people for those places where we feel our love may be constrained by any judgment or criticism and let go of that judgment or criticism and accept ourselves and everyone else for who we are now. When we limit our love and predicate the full effulgence of our love on conditions which must first be met we are being selfish and manipulative. Love can never arise from selfish or manipulative behavior it can only be spoiled by these.

It may seem hard to love other people unconditionally. We may feel someone we otherwise might love unconditionally has a particular character trait which we feel is repulsive and we may want them to change that in order to make themselves worthy of our love. That is such a selfish ego game. Who are we to decide for others how they should be? It may be the case that someone who cares for us may discover for themselves what they may want to change about themselves which may make it easier for us to love them but they must do that of their own accord in their own good time and not be pushed to change or be manipulated to change because this pushing manipulative behavior is selfish and aggressive and may cause unpleasant reactions in which the person we feel we might otherwise love resents us and becomes angry with us.

So whenever we come across any limits we may feel in our loving regard for others or for ourselves we should change ourselves in response to those limits and learn to accept and to love in response to such feelings without limits or conditions. Love is not about putting ourselves ahead of everyone else, but when we love someone in a conditional manner that is exactly what we are doing; we are putting what we want ahead of truly loving someone.

We impoverish our lives by the limits which we place on our love. Worse, we impoverish the lives of others whom we should love unconditionally. We cannot afford this sort of poverty of our spirits. It demeans us, making less of us in our own eyes as well as in the eyes of others. Only by embracing ourselves and everyone we meet with our full effulgent and unconditional love can we empower ourselves to love and to heal ourselves and to love and help heal those around us whoever they may be.

We must let go of all of our terms and conditions and judgments and criticism and accept the world as it is and accept everyone in the world as they are. Acceptance is an incredibly powerful fulcrum which enables our love to be a lever that moves the world. We may move the world with our love in every moment, and the world will love us all back the more in return.

When we empower ourselves to be unconditionally loving to everyone we meet, including ourselves we will have never regret it; instead we will make ourselves and everyone we meet happier, healthier more loving human beings.

BIO: Fledgling author Greg Gourdian has worked with the general public as a psychic reader for a little over four years from 1981 to 1986. Much of his written work is channeled, although he will admit that he has no idea who many of the sources for his channeled work may be. He has many strange tales to tell regarding his spiritual journey and he attempts to tell his tales in a humorous or entertaining manner. While not an accredited teacher, Greg has taught classes in psychology, sociology, metaphysics and parapsychology.

Visit Greg's blog at http://tangledintime.blogspot.com/

I Love You-Will You be My Valentine?

"I love you" is a "sweetest" one liner...we all likes to listen...not only once in a year but everyday. Though there should not be any particular occasion or time for one to express his or her love to any person whom they love...it should be often and regular, but how many of us really understand the meaning and importance of love. People across the globe...we all love to be loved by others...by our parents, by our friends and by that "Special" person of our life. Often we don't understand the importance of love...feelings and emotions. There is a misconception that your love for that special person starts from bedroom.

To start with...Why does one love? Is it to find an escape from the pains of loneliness or is it to feel the warmth of fulfillment that it brings to one's heart? To me, love is the essential of all being. One cannot exist without the love of another. To live for another makes a life complete in every way. Each beat of one's heart, each breath, each small thought signifies a Small part of a love that is shared with another.

Who does one love? Are two people destined to come together or is it by chance alone? Only one's heart can tell when love has come. It can feel the longing desire from its deepest point and it can feel the overpowering attraction when they are close. One loves whom his heart has chosen.

When does one love? Does one share their love in the soft mist of the early morning or in the crisp breeze of the darkening night? Those that are truly in love know no night or day, no dark or light. Love is a continuous thing.

So, if you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn't choose to rest in the other person's heart.

And if you find someone else in love with you and you don't love him/her, feel honored that love came and called at your door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return. Do not take advantage. Do not cause pain. How you deal with love is how you deal with you, and all our hearts feel the same pains and joys, even if our lives and ways are different.

And if you fall in love with someone, he/she falls in love with you and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame, let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time. Remember that you don't choose love. Love chooses you. All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life.

Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then reach out and give it away. Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem it poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in any way you can. There is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they understand love only as a need. They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and they begin to look at love as something that flows to them Rather than from them.

The first blush of new love is filled to overflowing, but as their love cools, they revert to seeing their love as need. They cease to be someone who generates love and instead become someone who seeks love. They forget that the secret of love is that it is a gift, and that it can be made to grow only by giving it away.

Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into saying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do.

Love always has been and always will be a mystery. Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life. IF YOU KEEP YOUR HEART OPEN, IT WILL COME AGAIN.

Why Valentines Day?

In the third century, the Roman Empire was ruled by Emperor Claudius II Gothicus. He was nicknamed Claudius the Cruel because of his harsh leadership and his tendency for getting into wars and abusing his people. In fact, he was getting into so many wars during the third century that he was having a difficult time recruiting enough soldiers.

Claudius believed that recruitment for the army was down because Roman men did not want to leave their loves or families behind, so he canceled all marriages and engagements in Rome. Thousands of couples saw their hopes of matrimony dashed by the single act of a tyrant. And no one seemed interested in standing up to the emperor.

But a simple Christian priest named Valentine did come forward and stood up for love. He began to secretly marry soldiers before they went off to war, despite the emperor's orders. In 269 AD Emperor Claudius found out about the secret ceremonies. He had Valentine thrown into prison and deemed that he would be put to death.

As Valentine was awaiting execution, he fell in love with a blind girl, who happened to be the jailers daughter. On the eve of his execution, with no writing instruments available, Valentine is said to have written her a sonnet in ink that he squeezed from violets. Legend has it that his words made the blind woman see again. It was a brief romance because the next day Valentine was clubbed to death by Roman executioners.

St. Valentine gave his life so that young couples could be bonded together in holy matrimony. They may have killed the man, but not his spirit. Even centuries after his death, the story of Valentine's self-sacrificing commitment to love was legendary in Rome. Eventually he was granted Sainthood and the Catholic Church decided to create a feast in his honor. They picked February 14 as the day of celebration because of the ancient belief that birds (particularly lovebirds, but also owls and doves) began to mate on that very day.

It's surprising to know that Valentine's Day is really founded on the concept of love in marriage. On This Valentine's Day, what are you doing to keep the love in your marriage burning? While giving a gift and card, having a candlelight dinner, and sharing special words of love are all important, the true spirit of Valentine's Day needs to last throughout the year.

So, on this Valentine's Day...I like to ask you...will you be my Valentine. I don't promise to you...stars and moon, I know that the life ahead is not going to be a bed of roses...but I promise that I will keep you happy. I will not give tears to your eyes. I will be true and faithful to you. I wish you to walk with me, in this journey of life...together...holding hands. I want to hug you tight...close to my heart...so that nothing can harm you. So, will you be my valentine...not for today...not for one year...but for my life...till the time I breathe my last.

I know that you think that I don't even mean a single word I say. But it's only words and words are all I have to take your heart away. This world has lost its glory let's start a brand new story now my love. (Words...BoyZone)

"I love you"...for what you are and as you are...with all that you have...with your past and present...with your good and bad qualities...with your strengths and weaknesses. For me "I love you" is not just a sentence...for me every "I love you" is a promise, a commitment to stand by the person you love- whatever the odds, whatever the outcome, whatever the cost. Every "I love you" is a pact. A sworn oath to stick by each other, to be there for each other, no matter what personal sacrifice is necessary, and no matter what Consequences may befall. Every "I love you" has nothing to do with touches, or kisses, or sweet nothings whispered in an attentive ear.? I love you" is more than all these things. It means loyalty and honor and trust without the expectation of the same in return.

Again, I know that you think that I don't even mean a single word I say. But it's only words and words are all I have to take your heart away. This world has lost its glory let's start a brand new story now my love. (Words...BoyZone)

Walk with me, the path of life,to explore every bend of the road. Enjoy with me the beauty of life,along its wonderful way. Find comfort with me, in each other's arms, when grief crosses our path. Find strength with me, in each other's strength, when despair lies in wait. Laugh with me, a single true laugh, to enlighten another's distress. Cry with me, a single true tear, to understand true happiness. Cherish with me, the wonders of life, as they need to be preserved. Rejoice with me, in the mysteries, of what is yet to be. Find peace with me, in each other's souls, when the world has gone insane. Find love with me, in each other's hearts, until this life has been fulfilled. And when the path comes to an end I hope we can say from within, we've known the beauty of true love, our love came from within.

I know that you still think that I don't even mean a single word I say. But it's only words and words are all I have to take your heart away. This world has lost its glory let's start a brand new story now my love. (Words...BoyZone)

It's only words and words are all I have to take your heart away. This world has lost its glory let's start a brand new story now my love. (Words...BoyZone)

With lots of love...and Care

Sanjeev Sharma (Mobile: +91-9876328841) (E-mail: ss_himachali@yahoo.com; sanjeev.himachali@gmail.com) (Blog: http://sanjeevhimachali.blogspot.com/)

Hip-Hop Love Stories and the Construction of Socially Acceptable Urban Identities

Hip-Hop has historically existed as a male-dominated industry. Being a reflection of urban life and struggle, past Hip-Hop artists have been forced to maintain a certain level of masculinity in order to be accepted by their urban communities. Old school rappers who talked about love were often viewed as soft or corny. Because of this perception, the existence of love in Hip-Hop is a fairly new concept.

As the movement has gained support and recognition throughout the world, love has become an increasingly common theme in Hip-Hop music and poetry. However, the taboo still exists. Even today, Hip-Hop artists and poets present their love stories in a manner that allows them to maintain socially acceptable identities. Hip-Hop stories about love must still meet the masculine ideology in which the movement is rooted in order to be perceived as real and true.

The purpose of this study is to analyze Hip-Hop love narratives and how artists present these love stories in order to construct socially acceptable identities. I believe personal narratives are closely tied to the construction of identities. It is through personal narratives that people can recount life-changing events, realize socially acceptable behavior and create individual identities.

I have researched and studied several Hip-Hop love songs and analyzed the lyrics as text and poetry. In my research, I have found five common narrative forms used by Hip-Hop poets to tell their love stories: contrasting, perceptual, spiritual, conversational and metaphoric. These five narrative forms are used not only to present the story correctly, but also to maintain positive perception among a society that might view this sensitivity as weak or disrespectable. I plan to demonstrate each of these narrative forms and show how the poets use them to tell their love stories while establishing acceptable identities.

The Contrasting Narrative

One of the most common forms of Hip-Hop love stories is the contrasting narrative. Many artists use Hip-Hop music and poetry to tell stories about the negativity surrounding their urban environments. The contrasting narrative allows the poet to express his or her love story as a contrast to this negativity while constructing an acceptable identity because that negativity is real and understood in urban communities.

A great introductory example to the contrasting narrative would be the following passage from Method Man's "All I Need":

Back when I was nothin'

You made a brother feel like he was somethin'

That's why I'm with you to this day boo no frontin'

Even when the skies were gray

You would rub me on my back and say "Baby it'll be okay"

In this song, the poet uses the contrasting narrative to show his love for someone who stood by him when "skies were gray." He speaks of his love interest as someone who helped him get through troubled times, thus providing a positive contrast to his negative surroundings.

Another example of the contrasting love narrative can be seen in this passage from Guru's "All I Said":

This world is crazy, she's supposed to help me stay sane

Supposed to help with the pain, supposed to help me maintain

In this song, Guru uses the contrasting narrative to share his view of what love should be. He admits that his "world is crazy", and that his love interest is the one person who can make it bearable.

In "She Tried", Bubba Sparxx uses the contrasting narrative to tell a story that actually recalls his love being there for him when he was in trouble with the law:

A fly country girl, just workin' them gifts

She's my queen, was a virgin I guess

But I ain't never ask and I ain't never tell

But Betty had the cash every time I went to jail

This song further illustrates the use of contrasting narratives to express love. Though the poet confesses spending a lot of time in jail, Betty was always there to bail him out, again acting as a positive contrast to his troubles.

The Perceptual Narrative

Another common narrative form of Hip-Hop love stories is the perceptual narrative. Like the contrasting narrative, the perceptual narrative is based around the negativity that surrounds the poet's life. But instead of presenting this love as a contrast to that negativity, the poet uses this narrative to explain how that love changed his or her previously negative perceptions. This narrative form also allows the poet to construct a socially acceptable identity due to the acknowledgement of the negativity of urban life.

In "Jazzy Belle", Andre of Outkast uses the perceptual narrative to tell of how his love changed his former perception of women:

Went from yellin' crickets and crows, witches and hoes to queen thangs

Over the years I been up on my toes and yes I seen thangs

...

Now I'm willin' to go the extra kilo-

Meter just to see my senorita get her pillow

On the side of my bed where no girl ever stay

House and doctor was the games we used to play

But now it's real Jazzy Belle...

In this song, Andre talks about a personal change of perception caused by love. He admits that at one time he thought of women as "witches and hoes." But "now it's real", and he has a new perception of women as "queen thangs."

Another great example of the perceptual narrative can be found in the following passage of Black Star's "Brown Skin Lady":

I don't get many compliments, but I am confident

Used to have a complex about, gettin' too complex

You got me, willin' to try, looked me in the eye

My head is still in the sky, since you walked on by

In this example, the poet admits to having relationship issues, but tells of how love helped him to overcome these issues. The poet's love interest helped him to change his perception of love and fear of "gettin' too complex".

In "Ms. Fat Booty", Mos Def further illustrates this point by demonstrating the perception of other men and speaking to his love on how he is different:

Yo, let me apologize for the other night

I know it wasn't right, but baby you know what it's like

Some brothers don't be comin' right

I understand, I'm feelin' you

Besides, 'Can I have a dance?' ain't really that original

In this song, the poet uses the perceptual narrative to acknowledge that some men "don't be comin' right", but that he has a different perception of women than these other men.

In "Come Close", Common uses the perceptual narrative to express how love has made him change from his old ways:

I want to build a tribe wit you

Protect and provide for you

Truth is I can't hide from you

The pimp in me

May have to die with you

Although the poet used to be a "pimp", an urban term for a man who romances a large number of women, he tells of how his love interest has changed his actions and perceptions.

The Spiritual Narrative

A third common form of Hip-Hop love stories is what I like to refer to as the spiritual narrative. The spiritual narrative relies on the poet's characterization of love as a kind of godly being, spiritual force or royalty, often with the feeling that the story teller has to protect that force. The spiritual narrative allows the storyteller to construct an acceptable identity by characterizing love as spiritual or perhaps even predetermined.

A great example of the spiritual narrative can be found in this passage of The Roots' "You Got Me":

Somebody told me that this planet was small

We use to live in the same building on the same floor

And never met before

Until I'm overseas on tour

And peep this Ethiopian queen from Philly

Taking classes abroad

Here, the poet uses the spiritual narrative to describe the time, place and emotions that his love was founded on, speaking of them as if they were somehow meant to happen. He also refers to his love interest as "this Ethiopian queen from Philly", using the royal characterization so common in spiritual love narratives.

In "Love Language", Talib Kweli also uses a spiritual narrative form and refers to his love as a kind of royalty:

Now if they call you out your name

Then that's a different thing

Anything but Queen

I'll go to war like a King

This example shows the protection aspect of common spiritual love narratives. The poet feels it is unacceptable for anyone to "call you out your name", or in other words, use derogatory language toward his love. If someone were to do so, he would "go to war like a King", thus maintaining his masculinity.

In "Mind Sex", Dead Prez uses the spiritual narrative to talk about love introductions:

African princess, tell me yo' interests

Wait, let me guess boo, you probably like poetry

Here's a little something I jotted down in case I spotted you around

So let me take this opportunity

In this song, the poet uses the spiritual narrative to tell a story about the introductory conversation he had with a love interest. He refers to her as "African princess", once again showing the tendency of poets who use the spiritual narrative to refer to their love interests as royalty.

The Conversational Narrative

The fourth common form for Hip-Hop love stories is the conversational narrative. The conversational narrative allows the poet to recite or recreate a conversation with his or her love and present it as play-like story about a specific love experience. Conversational love narratives are typically characterized by introductory speech and compliments, and are most commonly used as tools to tell a story about a first meeting or impression. These narratives allow the storyteller to construct an acceptable identity mainly because they often include many smoothly-structured compliments, and make the poet look like a cool ladies man.

A great example of the conversational love narrative can be found this passage from Dead Prez' previously mentioned "Mind Sex":

Pardon me love but you seem like my type

What you doin' tonight?

You should stop by the site

We could, roll some weed play some records and talk

I got a fly spot downtown Brooklyn, New York

In this example, the poet is reciting the conversation between himself and a love interest. As with many conversational narratives, it is based around meeting someone for the first time. The poet is telling a story about a girl he met that "seem[ed] like my type". He then inquires "What you doin' tonight?", and follows with a list of charming speech in an attempt to create a social relationship with the girl.

In a similar narrative, "Beautiful Skin", Goodie Mob uses the following conversational narrative to retell the first phone conversation he had with his love interest:

This is Carlito from a couple of days ago, you sound tired

Forgive me if I've called you too late

But what better time to relate mind-states?

Where could I begin?

Has anyone ever told you 'You got beautiful skin'?

This example further illustrates the use of introductory language in conversational narratives. The poet asks his love interest if she would like to "relate mind-states", or get to know each other. He then tells her that she has "beautiful skin", an often successful introductory complement given to women.

Cee Lo uses the following conversational narrative in "Slum Beautiful":

Look at you, unbelievably, brilliant beautiful you

You're looking deliciously divine darling you really and truly do

The very thought of has got me running at the speed of love

Exploring everything about you from the ground to the God above

In this song, the poet uses the conversational narrative to speak directly to his love interest through the song. Note the wide range of compliments offered in this passage, as well as the charm, again illustrating a common aspect of the conversational narrative.

The Metaphoric Narrative

This fifth form of Hip-Hop love stories is possibly the most fascinating. It is the metaphoric narrative. The metaphoric narrative is used when the poet speaks of love in a metaphor of some kind. The most popular and socially acceptable form of metaphoric narrative is using Hip-Hop as the metaphor. Many followers of the movement view Hip-Hop as a driving force of love and happiness in their lives. Thus, many metaphoric love narratives revolve around Hip-Hop itself.

A good example of such a metaphoric narrative is the following passage from Black Eyed Peas' "Rap Song":

Yo, she got hips to hop

And she ain't goin' pop

She like a record that I wanna rock

When I'm rollin' in my ride cruisin' down my block

In this example, the poet actually uses a unique play on words and speaks of a love interest as a Hip-Hop metaphor. He relates this person to "a record that I wanna rock".

The group further extends the metaphor in the following passage:

She like a beat that makes me wanna grab the mic

She like the lyrics that I wanna recite

She like the old school mic with the cable

You can bring your records and I'll bring the turntable

Again, the poet relates his love interest to other things he and his audience love, including "old school mic with the cable", reciting lyrics and spinning records on a turntable.

Another great example of the metaphoric narrative is in The Roots' "Act Too ... Love of My Life":

Learnin' the ropes of ghetto survival

Peepin' out the situation I had to slide through

Had to watch my back my front plus my sides too

When it came to gettin' mine I ain't tryin' to argue

Sometimes I wouldn'ta made it if it wasn't for you

Hip-Hop, you the love of my life and that's true

This passage is unique because it utilizes both the metaphoric and contrasting narrative techniques. The poet refers to Hip-Hop as "the love of my life", while simultaneously showing how that love created a positive contrast to the tough "ropes of ghetto survival". The poet admits that he "wouldn'ta made it if it wasn't for you", showing that his love for Hip-Hop was and is a driving force in his life.

And that leads us to the most popular metaphoric Hip-Hop love narrative of our time. In "I Used to Love H.E.R.", Common Sense uses the metaphoric narrative to express his love for Hip-Hop. He starts off the narrative with the following passage:

I met this girl, when I was ten years old

And what I loved most she had so much soul

She was old school, when I was just a shorty

Never knew throughout my life she would be there for me

In this example, the poet starts off telling a story about a girl he met when he "was ten years old", and how she was always there for him. The poet continues to use the metaphoric narrative to speak of this girl, including the good times and hardships they faced together. Not until the end of the poem does the listener actually realize that the entire song is a metaphor. The song ends with the following passage:

I see rappers slammin' her, and takin' her to the sewer

But I'ma take her back hopin' that the stuff stop

Cause who I'm talkin' bout y'all is Hip-Hop

In this song, the poet used the metaphoric narrative to tell a story about the love of his life, the struggles she faced, and his desire to save her. In the end, he admits that this love is not a real person, but instead his love of Hip-Hop.

The presentation of Hip-Hop love narratives is a very difficult task. In order to talk about love and still construct a socially acceptable urban identity, artists tend to implement one of the five successful love narrative forms. I believe that our society's analysis of Hip-Hop music and culture is lackluster at best. The Hip-Hop love narratives presented above could provide a great basis for linguistic and sociolinguistic studies. Not only are they presented in a variety of styled narrative forms, but they also include deep thought, perception and analysis of the urban environment that characterizes an increasing majority of American society. Through the analysis and study of these love narratives, linguists could come to a greater understanding of and appreciation for the Hip-Hop vernacular, literature and, ultimately, culture.

Works Cited / Discography

A Tribe Called Quest. People's Instinctive Travels and the Paths of Rhythm. Jive Records, 1990.

Black Eyed Peas. Bridging the Gap. Interscope Records, 2000.

Black Star. Mos Def & Talib Kweli are Black Star. Rawkus Records, 1998.

Bubba Sparxx. Deliverance. Interscope Records, 2003.

Common. Electric Circus. MCA Records, 2002.

Common Sense. Resurrection. Relativity Records, 1994.

Dead Prez. Let's Get Free. Relativity Records, 2000.

Goodie Mob. Still Standing. La Face Records, 1998.

Guru. Jazzmatazz Streetsoul Vol. 3. Virgin Records, 2000.

Method Man. Tical. Def Jam Records, 1994.

Mos Def. Black on Both Sides. Priority Records, 1999.

Outkast. ATLiens. La Face Records, 1996.

Outkast. Stankonia. La Face Records, 2003.

Talib Kweli & DJ Hi-Tek. Train of Thought. Rawkus Records, 2000.

The Roots. Things Fall Apart. MCA Records, 1999.

Nathaniel Long is the creator and editor of Hip Hop Linguistics, a website dedicated to studying, interpreting and understanding hip-hop music, language, philosophy and culture. You can read more articles and reviews at http://www.hiphoplinguistics.com/